Do You Suffer from Maintenance Suicide?

 In this world there are numerous concerns and responsibilities.  Most of us would agree that we have a moral obligation to care for others less fortunate, struggling with ill health, or in difficult situations, right?  Raising children, wayward teens, addictions, divorce, aging parents, the list goes on and on.  The numerous needs and demands that distract us from finding inner peace can cause great anxieties.  We all want to be happy, right?  However, how can you be happy when life is crappy? How do we avoid the traps and pitfalls of life and preserve our joy?

 One way is to work hard to earn an income that helps us afford a life we love.  I’d say the majority of us are willing to work hard to earn an income that will allow us to find delight in a nice home, a classy car or decked out truck or a waterfront vacation retreat for example. 

 The desire for more pleasures seems appealing at the time and sounds like a good idea until the demands of it all choke and suffocate any breath of satisfaction we might find. If you’re pulled in too many different directions, and have succumbed to a life of maintenance more than making time to enjoy what you have, something needs to change.  We can get caught up in the trap of maintenance suicide.  You maintain your vehicle, your home, your yard, your hair.  And when you take a good look at the most important aspects of your life to maintain; your body, your nutrition, your pure water, your breathing, your brain, your emotional state and mind, you’ll typically find those parts of your life have been put on layaway, hoping someday you will have time to invest in it.  Someday is today ladies and gentlemen!

 If you’re not paying attention to all that you are taking on, you could be tremendously stressed out and on the verge of burnout.  As a motivational speaker I’m often asked to present “Preventing Burnout and Living the Life You Love.” This interestingly enough is my most popular presentation for the Health Care Industries.  I am amazed by how many people have not learned stress reduction techniques.  Many do not understand the mind and how thoughts affect health.  And many do not know the difference between stress and burnout!!!  If this sounds like you, heed to this advice and take some time to learn more.  It could make the difference between living a life of regrets or living a life you really love!!!

 Now then, let’s talk about how to prevent stuff from stealing your joy.  Stuff that at first makes you thrilled to think about experiencing life with it, can be a problem in disguise. Sometimes what you have is enough, yet because you’re stuck in a rut, feeling sad and blue from too much to do, you lose your appreciation of it.

The first step to assure you stay joy filled in life is to remember to remember what you have and are grateful for.  I encourage my clients as their coach to verbally give thanks for what they love.  Write three things down in a journal each night and challenge yourself to come up with something different each day.

Secondly, take steps to simplify your life.

 If you’re considering something you want, or think you need, count both:

  a. The cost in dollars and cents

 b. How much time you’ll be paying for it and maintaining it

 Will the pleasure you’re dreaming about last?  Prevent yourself from getting entangled in the initial excitement you feel while envisioning all the desirable parts of the purchase.  Evaluate how much time you really have to enjoy what you want to buy.  Expand your imagination to see reality, both pros and cons.  Balance your perspective.  Step away from the craving long enough to comprehend all the benefits and consequences of such a decision.

 When you consider cost, time it will take to pay it off, time to take care of it, and time away from caring for your health, building healthy relationships, and taking time off to just rest and relax, you will make a wiser decision– not a hasty one.  

 Rest and relaxation is an asset most people neglect to invest in. I’m not talking about resting and watching TV, or resting and reading a book, or resting and gardening or building a project.  I mean quiet time to just be.  To listen to your deeper inner voice and learn what is most important to you.  Your deeper voice knows what’s best.  Your conscious mind is simply a repeater.  After years of studying the mind and working with coaching clients, my education and experience proves to me that the conscious mind is often a liar.  It sets traps and follows programs that repeat past mistakes. Learning to meditate, understanding and practicing self-hypnosis, strengthening your faith through spiritual contemplation and prayer are all excellent ways to enable your higher self to shine.

 Be reminded that it takes considerable time to clarify the magnitude of variables you face each day and determine if your desire is what you really want and will significantly benefit from. Life can become a complex web of decisions that are consuming your every thought.  And when it gets to a point of feeling stressed out, overwhelmed, and anxious, it’s probably a critical time where you need to ask for help.  Many individuals seek a life or business coach to help them get clear on their priorities.  Gaining a fresh perspective from a trained professional is a good practice.  You don’t know what you don’t know, and the best way to see the forest through the trees is by working with a coach. 

 Remember, nothing is more important and vital to life than making sure you put your priorities in the proper place.


Lori Bestler is a nationally recognized Mind EmPowerment Coach, Award Winning Motivational Speaker, Corporate Trainer, and Self Help Recording Artist with MindScapes Unlimited.

Lori has helped to transform thousands of men and women’s lives through her Strategic Mind System of Success, Rapid Results Coaching Program and Audios, Retreats, Seminars and Speaking engagements. She specializes in working with high level entrepreneurs and independent business professionals with busy minds as well as empathic and high sensory individuals. Lori helps clients overcome barriers in thought patterns, limiting beliefs and behavior which can lead to issues such as stress, anxiety, negative thinking, and weight problems, lack of focus and follow-through, and procrastination.  Clients experience results in areas such as financial success, improved relationships, confidence, high self-esteem, stress reduction, behavior change, better health, and greater fulfillment in life.  Ms. Bestler runs a private coaching and hypnotherapy practice in Anoka, MN, assisting clients in the Minneapolis, St. Paul and surrounding Twin Cities Metropolitan Areas, as well as all over the U.S.

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