The perception that what you are thinking is true, is one of the biggest mind deceptions there is.

That’s why recreating a new mindset — which often involves changing your habits, standards or expectations — can be the most helpful in dealing with negative thinking.

1. Reassess your values. Do you need to vacuum and dust twice a week? Could a grilled cheese sandwich replace homemade lasagna once in a while? Redefine cleanliness, success and fulfillment, and you may operate with a little less guilt and frustration. Have to, should, can’t, must, always, never, are destroyers of joy. They can set unreasonable demands on yourself — or others. LET GO! Be flexible.

2. Practice negative thought-stopping. Stop negative thoughts from infiltrating your beliefs immediately. Refuse to replay negative situations or self criticizing thoughts in your mind. If you starve a thought by not feeding it, or giving it any of your attention, it will cease to rule your perceptions.

3. Practice positive self-talk. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Pessimism can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. That is, if you think your presentation isn’t going to go well, you may indeed stumble through it. One negative thought can lead to another, and soon you’ve created a mental avalanche. Try telling yourself things such as, “Even though it’s tough, I can handle this situation.” Be positive. Always expect the best.

4. Open your mind. Try looking at your situation from a new reference point. Instead of feeling frustrated that you are home with a sick child, look at it as an opportunity to bond, relax and finish a load of laundry. “I can make good out of any situation. I focus on solutions, not problems”.

5. Forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes aren’t permanent reflections on you as a person. They are isolated moments in time. Tell yourself, “I made a mistake but that doesn’t make me a bad person.”

6. Create an assets column. Imagine all of the things that bring you joy in life — vacation, children, pets. Think about the good parts of your life. Ask yourself, “What other things have gone well recently?” “What personal goals have I achieved in the past that was a big accomplishment?” Call on this list when you are full of “stinkin thinkin”. It will put things into perspective and serve as a reminder of life’s successes and joys.

7. Laugh. Create a world that welcomes laughter. To make a conscious effort to take time for laughter is the key to positive thinking. While you’re laughing you cannot think of anything else, which makes it physically very relaxing. Studies reveal that laughing opens up your arteries, allowing blood to flow more freely. A few hearty laughs are as good for you as jogging up to half an hour.

8. Nurture your imagination and creativity. Take time to be creative without an expectation of evaluation. Free creativity that allows the mind to just flow, be, and express, is a way to empty the mind of its overwhelming collection of thoughts.

9. Look at the big picture. Ask yourself, “Will this matter in a year? In five years?” The answer is usually no. Realizing this makes a stressful situation seem less overwhelming.

There is no better time than the present to start living in the fullest expression of your most authentic self. Get rid of the self critique, perfectionist, and “have to” voice from with in. You get one chance at this thing called life, so let go, lighten up, and let loose while you still have time. Live well!

Are you ready for positive change personally or within your organization?

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About Author

Lori Bestler is a nationally recognized Mind EmPowerment Coach, Award Winning Motivational Speaker, Corporate Trainer, and Self Help Recording Artist with MindScapes Unlimited.

Lori has helped to transform thousands of men and women’s lives through her Strategic Mind System of Success, Rapid Results Coaching Program and Audios, Retreats, Seminars and Speaking engagements. She specializes in working with high level entrepreneurs and independent business professionals with busy minds as well as empathic and high sensory individuals. Lori helps clients overcome barriers in thought patterns, limiting beliefs and behavior which can lead to issues such as stress, anxiety, negative thinking, and weight problems, lack of focus and follow-through, and procrastination.  Clients experience results in areas such as financial success, improved relationships, confidence, high self-esteem, stress reduction, behavior change, better health, and greater fulfillment in life.  Ms. Bestler runs a private coaching and hypnotherapy practice in Anoka, MN, assisting clients in the Minneapolis, St. Paul and surrounding Twin Cities Metropolitan Areas, as well as all over the U.S.  

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